I have an idea, a way of thinking we can all apply to our lives, “reframing”…. There are always students and graduates who believe they have a problem. I wonder what their lives would be like if they REFRAMED what they believe has held them up. Seeing things from a different perspective is one of the greatest tools you can have in your mental grab bag.
If you meet with a situation which disturbs you, I cordially invite you TO CHANGE YOUR MIND. It is not often that the situation can be changed, but you can ALWAYS change your mind about what is happening that may at first glance seem impossible or annoying..
Every day here on planet earth (especially at this time) choices are presented to us about the way we see things. Is the delay you are experiencing presented to you so you can swear and pace up and down, or is it a chance for a minute of meditation – a time to relax, breathe and listen to a CD? Is the constant fluff on the rug, a reason to get angry or whine, or one of the “joys” of having a four footed companion with fluff, which you love dearly. (The picture is one of my furry bundle of fluff).
Is the module you have been reluctant to finish a reason to quit, or is it an opportunity to do extra reading, get in deeper to the philosophy, read, and research so that in the end you get excited by the new learnings. Have you watched all the free YouTubes, read all the newsletters, have you come to the optional Sunday mornings and met the other trainees and graduates… or are you hunkered down in the “I can’t do this” frame.
A wonderful example is weight gain. We all know that there is only one way to loose weight – Eat less, exercise more! There you are. No more books or expensive courses needed. The diet cycle is endless until you begin to think of eating and food management in an entirely different way.
Reframing what was previously considered a problem can change both thinking and behaviour. Thinking “I really don’t need another slice of toast, it will go right to my hips” frames the food as a problem. Bread could be a pleasure, but you have thought about it as pain. What if you changed your point of reference to all those good things that you can eat and stay thin. Maybe you could make a game out of eating three servings of fruit and three servings of veg each day. Once you have eaten those, you can have a small slice of pizza, or whatever is a good reward for you (an eclair with double chocolate and cream perhaps is not a good reward – however, after you have eaten the good things you may not even glance at the eclair).
This week, choose one problem that is causing you deep stress (not just irritation). Think about reframing it.
A good friend of mine said to me when I was having a whinge…. “Life is joke and you are it”. She suggested I plan my tombstone to read something like this “Got everything done on time. Dead anyway” or “Finished everything on an impossible to-do list and died totally pissed off!”
I would much rather it read “She loved loving, was kind, knew how to have fun, and did a reasonably good job even if she didn’t answer all the emails on time and missed some classes”. Much better than “Was a perfect yogi and died in down-dog”.
WHAT WILL YOUR TOMBSTONE SAY IF YOU DIED TODAY? What would you like it to say?